From Alaska; Anchorage Daily News -14 July 2007

Bruce Kelly, CEO for Kelly's World of Airsickness Bags has categorically denied rumours of a hostile takeover of bagstage.org by CEO baggist Walter Brinker. "There is no truth to the rumours wildly circulating in the baggist world.....in fact, I believe Mr. Brinker has been secretly buying up large blocks of Kelly's World publicly traded stock and may be himself planning a hostile takeover of my operation,.... but we have the means to stop any such action by Mr. Brinker" states Mr. Kelly. However, baggist Kelly has admitted that he has secretly coveted Mr. Brinker's Air Guinée bag for many years.

The once genteel barf bag world that once operated on trust and trading amongst fellow collectors has been rocked in recent years by soaring prices for barf bags. Prices have escalated by some sources by as much as 1000%. A large number of barf bag speculators have entered the market hoping for quick returns on their money. Several international pension funds are now investing in the quite lucrative barf bag trade and are seeing annual returns of 40% or more on their money. The New York Stock Exchange recently suspended trading in Bagophily.com and Baghecht.de stock for one day when trading became over-heated.

Unfortunately, such speculative forces have also attracted the criminal element. Recently a man with multiple criminal convictions was apprehended by Danish police when he attempted to fence a stolen and very rare Royal Swazi Airlines barf bag belonging to Danish collector Mr. Homer Goetz. He had apparently by-passed Mr. Goetz's elaborate home security system by tunneling into his house. The Royal Swazi bag was returned to a quite disgruntled Mr. Goetz who found new coffee stains on the bag.

German resident and baggist, Mr. Paul Mundy reported a daring, daylight robbery attempt of his extremely rare first edition Batavia bag at his home. Fortunately Mr. Mundy thwarted the attempt with a show of force with his Smith & Wesson firearm. "Thank God, I lived in the USA for some years and was trained in the use of firearms", reported Mr. Mundy, who is presently facing charges for possession of a concealed weapon in the not so liberal German legal system that does not seem to recognize USA Constitutional 2nd Amendment rights.

American baggist Steve Silberberg reported a mentally unbalanced man had thrown acid on several of his bags being exhibited at the American Baywatch television show auditions. "I'm devastated, the Air Vietnam bag was the only one in existence and was irreplaceable at any price" reported a quite distraught Mr. Silberberg.

A man asked to use baggist Bob Grove's bathroom and walked off with 5 rare bags. Mr. Grove's bathroom and bedroom designs have consistently won home designer awards for their unique and tasteful use of individually framed barf bags. An enraged Mr. Grove refused to identify the stolen bags for this article, but commented... "let's just say they were not current British Airways bags, eh?".

Where will this madness end? It's anyone's guess, but the market could soon experience a downturn as some speculators are now turning their attention to airline swizzle sticks.